Over Half of Daters Hate Paragraph Texters

Worried about seeming too eager? New research shows over four-fifths of daters think quick replies are hot. 

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, millions of people are looking to up their dating game, and results from a new survey suggest quick texts are the way to go. The research, by sex-positive dating app Pure, also found two-thirds of daters are turned off by poor grammar.

The survey of 2,000 people about the importance of digital etiquette, revealed that 71% of respondents are turned off by lack of punctuation and poor grammar, and over half hate paragraph texters.

The team at Pure also analyzed Google search trends to see how people were shaking up their dating lives this February. The research found searches for ‘dating advice’ went up +88%.

Searches for ‘online dating etiquette’ have gone up by +268% in the past month in the UK, and searches for ‘dating advice for women’ jumped by +181%.

Kayla Crane, licensed marriage & family therapist, commented: “From a psychological standpoint, grammar often serves as a first impression in today’s digital dating world. When you’re swiping through profiles or texting someone new, the way they use language can significantly impact your perception of them. Good grammar is often subconsciously associated with intelligence, education, and attention to detail, while poor grammar can create an impression of carelessness or a lack of education, whether these assumptions are fair or not”.

The survey also revealed that two-thirds of respondents prefer audio calls to video chats, and when it comes to in-person conversations, 30% would love to meet the next day.

Anna Hint, a dating expert at the sex-positive dating app Pure shares her 5 lifehacks to help singletons succeed in their online dating game:

Mind your grammar. You might not think it’s that important, but punctuation matters. According to the survey, 71% of respondents get annoyed when their match casually skips the question mark at the end of a question sentence or doesn’t know the difference between “their” and “they’re.” 

Show interest through timely responses. 85% of respondents said that quick replies are a green flag. At the very least, it shows that your match is genuinely interested in getting to know you, and not just collecting likes or using you as a placeholder match — until someone more interesting comes along. Don’t have time to respond now? Let them know: “So nice to hear from you! I’m a little busy right now, but I’ll message you later and tell you all about it”.

Keep it short and sweet. Over half of respondents prefer to send (and receive) several short, consecutive messages instead of one or two paragraphs. Shorter texts give the option to emphasize certain points or ensure your question was seen. Many stories are also best delivered gradually, rather than in one two screens-long message.

Pick up the phone. Video chats are a popular choice. However, we were not surprised to learn that 66% of the respondents prefer audio calls to video chats, especially if you’re just getting to know each other. It’s more comfortable than video, yet more entertaining than just chatting. We recommend trying video chat or messages before you meet in real life, or for communicating after a date.

Plan a date as early as possible. Otherwise, you risk losing interest — the initial excitement might wear off, and you’d be tempted to swipe around to see who else is there. Here’s why we recommend scheduling that date as soon as you can — 74% of respondents believe that the ideal time for a date is within a week since you’ve matched. At least 44% would love for the date to take place in the next two days after matching, and as much as 30% would want to meet you within 24 hours after matching. Whew!

Anabel Cooper

Anabel is a graduate of King’s College London and upon graduating, she set out on a journey to inspire and empower women through her words. Besides working as a digital marketing expert, Anabel is a freelance copywriter.