To the first person who ever experienced a break-up, the Academy award goes to you. Recovering from a case of a broken heart is no easy feat. Whatever end of the break-up you were on, the pain of splitting up can be severe and intense. As many times as your friends and family may tell you to “move on,” that’s is easier said than done. The agony experienced during a break-up is like no other, even if you were aware that ‘the end is nigh’.
To that end, we worked with Life Coach Carole Ann Rice who gave us her top tips on how to come out of a break-up… and survive:
1. Don’t deny pain
Give yourself time to feel angry or weak and allow it to come. By setting aside times to be alone and have a good cry, you’re enabling yourself to authentically feel and work through your emotions. Don’t repress or supress what you’re feeling as this will only come up in blame and anger later on. Emotions aren’t something you can toss on the backburner; learn how to feel and let your face turn tomato red.
Look after yourself – massages, facial, boxset binges, chill out time. The starter pack to this can include everything from renting The Notebook with two tubs of Ben & Jerry’s to streaming the perfect Broken Hearts playlist on Spotify.
3. Good friends
Find yourself a good friend, someone who lets your get everything off your chest and say everything you’ve ever wanted to say about your ex. Hashing it out with a friend – complaining, crying, and ranting – gives you a chance to verbalise your feelings. In return for this be a good friend back! Don’t just dump all your baggage on them, but just ask someone to listen to you and get it out of your system, but make sure you’re there for them, too.
4. Don’t rush
Don’t rush into a new rebound relationship as you will take your baggage with you if you’re not fully healed. Giving yourself a gentle pace and setting aside time to grieve and wallow (though, we’re not exactly suggesting scheduling a 10-minute crying session in your iCalendar, but if that works for you!).
5. New you
Have your hair done, join a new hobby group, learn a language – distract yourself with something that’s good for you. Not only will this reinvigorate your daily life, it’ll show you that life goes on post-relationship, and you’re still a person even if you’re no longer a couple. You’ve survived before and you’ll survive again.