Why it’s OK to Grieve when You’re Going Through the Menopause

Grief is the normal and natural reaction to the loss of someone we love or something we value and that includes changes in the things we are familiar with. It may be surprising to learn that the menopause can also be a grieving experience. It can bring challenges on so many levels and the severity of symptoms can vary dramatically from woman to woman.  

Some women are able to navigate the menopause relatively easy, but for many it can be a real dark night of the soul. We feel our youth slipping away, at the same as trying to cope with mood swings, tiredness, brain fog and the loss of our childbearing capacity. Like any significant event in our lives, we need to allow ourselves to grieve as we let go of certain things that defined our sense of self and navigate the wobbles of menopause and the very definite life changes that it brings. 

If we give ourselves permission to accept and understand the losses of menopause and our feelings, we can stop railing against it and use our energy to learn about alternative forms of support to assist the transition. By accepting that we are grieving, sharing our feelings and voicing our fears, we can create a support network so we can take care of ourselves and allow others to take care of us too. 

Through menopause, we realise that life will be different. The needs of our body will change and what was familiar is now unfamiliar and things that may have worked for us before, may not work for us now. 

Find the right information and help that is available to you so you can choose the treatments and actions that will work for you and your body. Menopause is an individual experience for each of us. Trust your instincts and try different things. Some won’t work for you but some will. Be open to exploring new avenues, especially holistic and natural routes. Make an informed decision about HRT. Explore body identical hormones rather than chemical. The more you can learn the greater your choices become. 

Life is a journey with many experiences and changes along the way. It is ok to change and to become stronger and wiser through our struggles. Difficult times can trigger painful emotions and by really trying to understand ourselves and why we are feeling what we are feeling we can learn to write a new chapter and live again in our new and changed state. 

By: Lianna Champ

Lianna Champ has over 40 years’ experience in grief and losscounselling and is author of practical guide, How to Grieve Like A Champ