A Complete Guide to Being an Introvert

Is this world more suitable for extroverts? We are constantly being pushed towards success. We need to get noticed if we want to succeed at college. We must do pretty well at networking when we want professional progress. All kinds of success demand exposure. Introverts don’t want exposure. We’re more comfortable in quiet surroundings. We have a reflective personality that feels vulnerable when exposed.

Yes, this society might be more suitable for extroverts. However, being an introvert doesn’t mean you’re completely isolated from the outside world. Maybe you’re not as outgoing as an extrovert, but the doors of success are still not closed. You need a bit more effort, but you’ll get there.

The goal for success demands some adaptations, but it doesn’t mean you should change who you are. We’ll give you few tips on how to be the best and more successful introvert you know.

1. Small Talk Is Overestimated. You Still Need to Do It!

Is there something that introverts despise more than small talk? It’s completely useless and you never know what to say. Good news: no one really likes talking in vain. Still, you have to make some contacts during events; you don’t want to be the person standing quietly at the corner of the room. You can have thoughtful conversations on any topic.

Small talk works according to scripts. Sports, books, situations, work, culture, food, weather, other people – those are the most common topics. No one wants you to get intimate in these conversations. Just make them casual, funny, short, and enjoyable.

Here’s a script that always works: clothes.

– Oh, hey Jane. Wow, I love your dress. (this was you)

– Thanks! It was really hard to find it.

– It suits your figure just perfectly. I was looking at something similar at the mall, but I didn’t have time to try it.

Then, Jane will tell you where she bought that dress, and you’ll show your interest. When that small talk is over, you’ll separate on friendly terms and carry on mingling. See? Easy.

If you’re at a professional event, you can always ask people about their experience with similar events. They will tell you about other hosts, and you’ll share your own experiences. There are always things to talk about; you just need to accept small talk as something necessary. Try!

2. Understand Your Strengths

What personality type are you? If you go through the characteristics of different types, you’ll realize they all have strengths. ISTJs, for example, are systematic, realistic, responsible, and honest. INFJs are idealistic, but they are also compassionate, insightful, and organized. ISFJs are devoted, responsible, and warm. INTJs are the most innovative and strategic type. ISFPs are sensitive and supportive. INTPs are intellectual, INFPs are loyal and sensitive, and ISTPs are action-oriented.

Every single personality type has characteristics that set their way to success. Identify those strengths in your own character. Enhance them, so you’ll show the world how valuable you are.

3. Write

Introverts have a hard time speaking up, but they are quite good at writing. Since you’re introspective, it’s easy for you to spend time analyzing your thoughts and emotions, and expressing them in written. That skill can take you to success!

Kerry Daniels, a writer from BestEssays, explains how important writing skills are for success in any profession: “If you’re an introvert who’s good at writing, that doesn’t mean you’re stuck with being a writer. In fact, every single profession demands writing skills nowadays. Business people are blogging, sending emails, and writing reports on a daily basis. Networking is no longer something that happens through small talk on events. It happens on LinkedIn, through writing. If you write well, you’ll have tons of opportunities to grab.”

Practice writing! Pick your niche and start blogging. That’s a nice way to start making connections.     

4. Understand: Humility Is Just as Important as Self-Esteem

Self-esteem is a great thing to have. Unfortunately, it’s usually linked to extroverts. Introverts are the ones who are humble. We need to understand something: humility is just as important as self-esteem in business and private relations. No one likes people with overwhelming self-esteem.

In fact, you can achieve a healthy level of self-esteem through humility. That statement shouldn’t confuse you. It’s pretty simple: you’re humble enough to realize what you’re not good at. However, that personal trait also helps you realize what you are good at. Focus on those aspects and make them the foundation of your self-esteem.

Just as extroverts need to work on their humility, introverts should work on self-confidence. Everyone has space for improvement.

5. Get More Social!

Finally, the tip you were afraid of: it’s important to be a tad more social if you want to be successful. You can’t reach stardom from your couch, even though you have your cat as your greatest supporter. Online networking is great, but you still need to start practicing your interpersonal skills in real situations.

That’s an easy thing to do when you start meeting people you like. Introverts not liking people? That’s a myth. We do like people; we just don’t like spending too much time in crowds.

It’s time to stop avoiding social time. Start calling the people you like and talk to them. Invite them for a coffee and join the parties. It’s okay to decline an offer for social gathering if you don’t like most of the people who’ll be there. If you do like them, however, grab the opportunity!

The more you hang out with the people you like, the better your communication skills will get. When you improve those skills, nothing will stop you on the path to success.

All 5 tips were easy to follow, right? Now, it’s time to stop reading and start doing. What will you do first? Let us know in the comments below!

Joan Selby is a life coach and a content marketer. She also runs her own blog about productivity, self improvement and writing tips. Joan is a Creative Writing graduate and fancy shoelover. A writer by day and reader by night, giving creative touch to everything. Connect with her on Twitter and Facebook

Joan Selby

Joan Selby is a life coach and a content marketer. She also runs her own blog medium.com/@joanselby where she posts about productivity, self improvement and writing tips. Joan is a Creative Writing graduate and fancy shoelover. A writer by day and reader by night, giving creative touch to everything. Connect with her on Twitter at @joan_selby