The Truth About Starting Over After Divorce Over 40

Although being divorced at 40 is rarely an ambition, according to research from 2011, over 40% of marriages end in divorce, with most occurring in people aged 40 – 44 years old. The truth is that no one wants to get divorced, but another truth is that it’s not always that bad. In fact, many people end up happier than when they were married. 

If you are ready for a new chapter in your life, the Wise law Divorce guide explains how you can apply for a potentially more amicable divorce thanks to the new ‘no fault’ laws. If you are already divorced or want to know what your life could look like after 40, we’ve set out the reality of what your new future could entail… 

Your children can be happier 

When you are not in a good place mentally with an unhappy marriage, it’s hard to be your best parenting self. Antagonism between parents is picked up easily by all children but at 40, you are statistically more likely to have older children. Although all children can be adversely affected by divorce, when offspring are older, there is more scope to talk things through, and help them understand what is happening and how you can help them.

You’ll have more time to focus on your interests 

When you are post twenties and thirties, the chances are you are more progressed in your career, meaning you won’t have to spend time and energy working on your next move at work to advance yourself. You will also have more time for pursuing passions and interests that may not have been an option while you were married. 

You’ll gain more time to learn about yourself

Divorcing at 40 also means you will have more time for self-reflection. As we become older, we often come to understand more about how we contributed to a situation. We appreciate the mistakes we have made, helping us to become more self-aware and less likely to make the same errors again, altogether leading to a more fulfilling future. 

You can travel with no compromises 

At 40, you have probably travelled already. However, you may not have been to all the places you want yet. When you are flying solo after divorce, you will be given a new opportunity to go on tour to your favourite destinations with not only confidence, but a new sense of freedom. 

There’s more time for friends

When you’re going it alone after 40 you will have more time to spend with existing friends or people you may have lost touch with.  It can be a great period for reconnection with old acquaintances too. In addition, if your marriage meant you didn’t have much time for friends, now is the perfect chance to make new ones.

You’ll become more self-sufficient

Maybe your former partner did all the cooking. Maybe they were the ones who did all the gardening, cleaning or handled the finances. At the age of 40, starting an emergency fund is crucial for financial security. Explore additional income streams like part-time jobs, side hustles, or monetizing hobbies. Cut unnecessary expenses and create a budget to maximize savings. With dedication and discipline, you can steadily build your emergency fund for a secure future.

After divorce at 40, you will now have the opportunity to do these things yourself. This will provide you with a new skill set and self-assurance, which can be very empowering.

The chance for a new relationship 

Starting a relationship when you are older often means you don’t have the same ambitions or pressures of marriage and children. It is more likely that you have already have children too, meaning many of these societal pressures are removed. You will have more time to develop a new relationship slowly, and organically with a focus on fun and enjoyment.  

And finally….

Although ‘divorce at forty’ may summon old fashioned and negative connotations, your age and experience will actually stand you in good stead for unashamedly embracing your new single life to the full. 

Brenda Kimble

Brenda Kimble is an entrepreneur and mother of 2 daughters and a son, plus their beagle named Duke! She loves blogging, crafting, and spending time with her family.