
Conscious Coupling: Are Gen Z the Pickiest Generation Yet?
‘Conscious Coupling’ is defined as a new Gen Z approach to dating that prioritises considering compatibility with a partner during the early phases – often by discussing key topics such as family, political beliefs, and even sexual preferences, prior to the first date.

As cultural attitudes towards relationships progress, Gen Z adults are now a generation of ‘conscious couplers’, according to new research from local dating app happn. The figures show that with a bigger dating pool available than ever before, Gen Z is choosing to ensure they are compatible and aligned – often politically and sexually – before even agreeing to a date.
The research shows that a whopping 90% of Gen Z have asked a potential date about either their family, political beliefs, financial situation or sexual fantasies, before agreeing to go on a date. It seems Gen Z are much more open and honest about what they want out of a relationship, as 85% think it’s acceptable to probe early in a relationship. In fact, 18% say they would ask these questions before the first date, and another 20% think it’s perfectly acceptable to ask them on the first date before taking things further. This is in stark contrast to older generations – just 6% of Gen X would bring these topics up ahead of a first date, and just 13% feel they would be appropriate topics for a first date. Amongst Baby Boomers, the figures fall to 2% and 7% respectively.
When looking into specific topics, 27% of Gen Z hope to cover a potential future life together before a first date, as a further 24% of Gen Z openly discuss having a family, and 13% will boldly discuss sexual fantasies.
Among Gen Z’rs who feel it is acceptable to bring up tricky conversations so early in a relationship, ensuring compatibility was found to be the biggest driver for 57% of them. Furthermore, 29% agree that with so much choice available nowadays there is no point wasting time with someone who isn’t right for them. In fact, nearly half (47%) would end a courtship immediately if they thought the person wasn’t right for them.
Older generations were found to have a different attitude. For example, nearly a fifth (17%) of both Gen X and nearly a fifth (17%) of Boomers would prefer to find out about personal preferences and beliefs ‘over time and the course of many dates’ before making a final decision.
The research also demonstrates that Gen Z refuse to date people they are not fundamentally aligned with, and would prefer to take time to meet the one. Around one in five (19%) do not plan to meet the person they want to marry prior to turning 25 – higher than any other generation, with only 7% of Gen Z and 6% of Boomers agreeing they felt the same at that age.
Looking at single Brits more widely, a vast proportion of bachelors and bachelorettes are looking for a long-term relationship. The research found that only 16% of singles are looking for friendship, 12% for a short term relationship and in fact, the same figure again (12%) are also seeking a sex friend.
Claire Rénier, dating expert at happn, said: “In today’s world, relationships continue to evolve – both from the point of first contact, and after. Younger generations are being shaped by the rise of dating apps and new ways to meet people, and crucially, they value their time, money and energy more than ever before.
“But, at happn, we understand that everyone’s approach to forming connections is unique. That’s why our newest relationship feature empowers you to set your preferences to help find that perfect spark. Come try it out and discover what works for you!”